So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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