9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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