i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
