Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
