Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
