just come out here and I will go home with you...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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