i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize