Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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