nut hugger
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
he puts the penis in happiness.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
