Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
