I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
