physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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