I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
