She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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