What a fucking waste of an outfit
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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