What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Randomize
