quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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