I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize