I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize