Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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