we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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