Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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