Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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