I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize