Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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