I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
