I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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