Is it normal to miss your booty call?
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Randomize