she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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