Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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