I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
