If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
