she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
