Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
