how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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