your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
