Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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