Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize