i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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