Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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