Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
