was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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