Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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