Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I just blew my weed a kiss
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
