Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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