a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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