She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
