I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize