With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
