Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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