hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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